The List Is A Practice
The practice is simple: Take a notebook or your phone and spend some quiet time reflecting on each category. Ask yourself:
What do I want to happen here?
Does the answer call for a meeting? Learning something new? Having a difficult conversation?
Whatever it is, write it down.
The List is not a competition. You are not meant to score 100 in every area of your life, all the time. Your focus will naturally shift. In each season of life, something different will require your attention.
Don't use the List to judge yourself. Its purpose is to put you at the center, so you can care for and manage all three: Home, Work, and Self. Be gentle with yourself. Progress, not perfection.
You Are The Center
As you work through the list, imagine yourself standing at the center of three circles: Home, Work, and Self. Whenever you make a decision, imagine making it from that center.
Over time, this simple image had a profound effect on me. I realized that I am not my role in one of these categories. I am not my work, my marriage, or even my appearance. I am the person standing at the center, caring for all of them. This is where I usually draw a small heart—a reminder to make decisions from love rather than fear. I never expected this idea of a center point to become so meaningful, but it did.
It taught me that when I care for each category from the center, with love, something unexpected happens: the center itself grows stronger. What a wonderful surprise it was to discover that. It gave me a sense of confidence and stability that I simply didn't have before. I hope it does the same for you.
The Three Questions
If something feels like a tangled knot, ask yourself one of these questions. They often help bring clarity:
What are the three most important things that matter here?
What is the fix that would enable the flow?
What are my RRRs in this situation: Role, Responsibility, and Relationship?